Smash Your Stereotype!

by Belinda on April 15, 2014

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Have you ever felt like there’s an invisible force holding you back from achieving your potential?

A feeling of deep unrest – that you are capable of more out of life but you can’t work out how to breakthrough to that new place of freedom, to follow your dreams and live each day as the real, authentic you.  Not the “you” everyone else expects you to be.

Welcome to the world of stereotypes.


Stereotypes insidiously seep into every layer of life to undermine our true potential.  If we dare to step outside the safe stereotypical circle we feel judged, put in a box, discredited, made fun of, criticized, humiliated, condemned, discredited or rejected.  Simply because we are not conforming to what our society and people around us think are appropriate attitudes and behavior.

Often people ask me what was the catalyst for my own personal transformation.   Yes there were a series of events that began a chain reaction of change – but at a more profound level, being able to live in a radically different culture where I couldn’t be put in a box enabled me to live each day being true to myself without fear of judgment, criticism or rejection.

Living in Panama, Central America as an Australian meant I was a tiny minority – especially being a single female.  People didn’t quite know how to categorize me so I had the freedom to float free from stereotypes and over time that evolved into an incredible sense of self-belief and self trust.

Let’s face it – how else would I have had the courage to ponce around the Internet in the skimpiest of bikinis in my 40’s lol?


Thankfully I didn’t have to bear people projecting their own issues and problems onto me with their stereotypical judgments and I had the freedom to discover a whole new life.  I firmly believe this would have never happened had I been living in a 1st world country.

So today, stop and think about it for a minute.  What stereotypes are holding you back?  What subtle messages are undermining your efforts on a daily basis to be the best you can be?

As a female, how should you behave?

    • What’s appropriate for your age?
    • What’s expected as a wife?
    • What your responsibilities are as a mother?
    • What do your friends expect of you?
    • What’s required at work to “fit in”?

When you think about the answers to these questions, are they stopping you from being true to yourself?  Are you living your life in a manner that is consistent with who you really believe you are on the inside?

OK, I know this is deep stuff.  But your long-term happiness depends on finding the answers.

Do you want to live your life being the person everyone else expects you to be –  living according to all the “shoulds”?  NO!

You can’t change the people around you or the stereotypes of society but you can change yourself.


Stop and examine your own self-stereotypes – are the standards you’re living by the result of everyone else’s expectations of what’s “right” and “appropriate”?

I share this today to encourage you that this could be the missing link to achieving the body you want.   If you don’t feel like you are capable due to your age or the fact you’ve had three kids or that you don’t deserve it because your family has always been overweight or your husband tells you you’re “OK” the way you are – then how can you ever have the body you secretly dream of?

Take a piece of paper right now and write down all the “shoulds” that exist in your life.   Look at it objectively.  How does each one make you feel?  Highlight the ones that make you feel suffocated, trapped, locked-in or disempowered.  Don’t judge yourself!  It’s OK to have negative feelings – it doesn’t mean you’re a bad person or that you love your husband any less or have failed your children.  It simply means you need to re-frame the way you see your world.

By being aware of these subtle stereotypical forces you can begin to make daily choices according to what you feel is right and in alignment with the true you.   You’ll be shocked at the immediate shift in your mood and health.  You’ll start to feel liberated and empowered.  And the fear of being judged and condemned for being different will quickly dissipate and over time it will become easier and easier to live your life as your authentic self, achieve your goals and dreams and find long term happiness.

Maybe reading this today it all sounds a little airy-fairy but I’ve lived this, walked it and proven that even just a little courage to challenge the stereotypes in your life can lead to miraculous change.

You don’t have to live your life according to what everyone else expects of you so start smashing your stereotypes today.  Break free and live your life as the real, authentic person you are created to be.  And just watch what happens…..


PS. If you’re ready to smash your body stereotype then click the link below!






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{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }

Nicole June 10, 2013 at 1:55 am

Wow! this is exactly what is happening to me!! I feel like I have to hold back because I’ve decided to change myself and people don’t like it because I don’t fit their stereotype! Also I have stereotyped myself in the sense of ”fitting in.” This time I’ll be working out and eating with my earplugs in. But why ‘fit in’ when you can ‘stand out’? Everyone will have to get used to the new me that will only be changing physically and mentally, maybe that’s something that people think as well, that if you start changing your body that you will change completely and become a different person in a bad way.


Belinda June 10, 2013 at 2:30 am

Hi Nicole – I love what you wrote: But why ‘fit in’ when you can ‘stand out’? Awesome!

There are so many reasons people try to keep you in their stereotypical “box”. Mostly it’s due to their own insecurities and feeling uncomfortable with being challenged by the changes you are making. And yes, I think people fear change….

Be strong Nicole and don’t look back – the changes you are making will have far reaching consequences in your life for the better!! And please keep me posted on how things go :)



Judith April 16, 2013 at 9:15 am

Awesome post Belinda! Encouraging others to live their dreams and seek out their authentic self is a fantastic rallying call – don’t look to fit in with the norm or the stereotype, we can be trailblazers and step into being a role model to others in our own lives!
You know, that’s just what you are to all who have benefited from your helpful advice and encouragement – you’re leading us to better and healthier lives by example :)


Belinda April 16, 2013 at 4:45 pm

Thank you Judith for taking the time to post such a great message on my blog! You made my day :)

Trying to fit in to what other people expect us to be is a sure recipe for unhappiness. Yes it takes courage to follow your own path but the rewards are priceless!

Bel xo


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