What’s Your Story?

by Belinda on May 31, 2014

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The most powerful stories are the ones we tell ourselves about who we are. Our stories can give us confidence and motivation or can hold us back from achieving our best.

Researchers have discovered we filter our memories, eliminating or emphasizing details to fit our “preferred” story. This means we create self-limiting beliefs based on bad experiences and past failures.

Here are some examples taken from the 3,000 plus members on my Get Lean Program that I’ve successfully coached over the years:

Group 1: People who think they don’t have time to go to the gym and train. They’re too busy, they work too much or they have got a family to take care of. Everything will fall apart if they put themselves first on the list. They don’t feel worthy of dedicating time to themselves.

Group 2: They think they just don’t have it in them. They have bad genetics and are just like their parents. Worse, they also don’t have the self-discipline and motivation that others seem to have. They’ve never been able to stick with anything.

Group 3: They think they are too old. They wish they started a decade ago when they were still young. After all, they’ve lost a lot of flexibility, maybe they even have injuries and their recovery isn’t like it used to be. It’s just too late.

Group 4: They’ve had a major setback in life. A divorce, an injury or a serious illness has derailed what was once healthy eating and regular exercise. The thought of beginning all over again feels overwhelming. They feel like a failure before they’ve even started. Why even bother?

If you can relate to any of these groups today, I know how you feel. I’ve been there, more times than I care to remember. Here’s an example…

My Asthma Story


At two years old I was diagnosed with asthma and the next 16 years were spent in and out of hospital. At 18 I almost died from an attack, spending two days in intensive care. Of course I had a fear of physical exertion, let alone exercise.

As I got older although my asthma disappeared – the anxieties and self-limiting beliefs didn’t.

My story was simply that I was destined to be horrendously unfit, chubby and full of cellulite for the rest of my life. That was, until one day in my late 30’s. Horrified by the downward spiral of my body I decided enough was enough.

I’d dreamt of learning to surf since I was 10 years old. So I bought a wetsuit, a surfboard and roof racks, and drove to the beach before I had a chance to change my mind. For six months months I was washed back to shore like a drowned rat, exhausted. Then finally one day I caught my first real wave. I’d overcome my fear of having an asthma attack out at sea and was surfing.


Newspaper article about me learning to surf in my late 30’s and competing.



How To Rewrite Your Story


Today I’m going show you how to deconstruct your self-limiting beliefs and open up your life (and body) to exciting, new possibilities.

  • Want to fit back into your “skinny” clothes? Done.
  • Want those lean and defined fitness model legs? Yes it’s possible.
  • Want to finally lose that last 10lbs? You got it.
  • Want to just feel really good about yourself again? You can, starting today.

These principles are universal and can be applied to any area of your life.


1. Make Space for Change i


The desire to hang onto our old story can be so strong that we sabotage our efforts to change. Even though we lose weight, the new person in the mirror doesn’t fit our past self-image, so we put the weight back on.

Or sometimes despite the obvious improvements we only see all our flaws in the mirror. This is why I encourage clients to take before photos. They are usually surprised and often shocked when they compare them to their current photos and realize how much progress they’ve made.

Tip: Start visualizing the person you want to be and the body you want to have. Take ownership of it. Write your limiting self-beliefs down and acknowledge that these are thoughts from the past. They are not current day truths and they can be challenged.

2. Press the Pause Button


Listen closely because this could be the answer you’ve been searching for. Instead of trying to argue or convince yourself that your story isn’t serving your best interests – just press the pause button!   Don’t try and work it all out or over analyze things. Just say, hey, my story isn’t working – let’s try something else. This simple, yet powerful technique can dramatically change your life for the better.

Tip: Put your self-defeating beliefs on hold and try out some new ideas. Write down how you’d like to feel, what you’d like to do and how you’d like to look.


3. Test Drive Your New Story


Now that you’ve paused your old story, it’s time to test out your new one. Take the pressure off yourself and just take your new story for a test drive. Think thoughts like “let’s try this out” not “what if this doesn’t work”.

Start to act different, as if your new story is true. This might feel scary at first but if you stick with it you’ll be surprised how easily the changes you want will start to happen. If you really are the kind of person who eats healthy food, what will you buy at the supermarket? If you workout regularly, then what workouts will you do?

Imagine how you’ll feel waking up in the morning energized and looking forward to the day. Not agonizing over what to wear, not avoiding the mirror or dreading the scales.

Your first steps don’t have to be perfect, just going in the right direction.

Tip: Write down two small steps based on your new story. Be sure to acknowledge yourself when you’ve taken each step. Each week, add one new step. Don’t be afraid to revise your story based on what feels right to you.


Time To Turn the Page


If you’re like many women, you know there are deeper reasons why you can’t lose weight or achieve the body you dream about. It’s all about the backstory behind your daily habits. Until you change your story, trying to change your habits will always be an uphill battle.

Maybe you’re thinking this all sounds a little too simple but the most powerful truths in life, are often the simplest. I challenge you to try out these three steps and let me know the results. When your story and habits start to align, anything is possible!

So….what’s your story going to be?


P.S. If you need help changing your story and would like a personalized road map that shows you step by step how to achieve your ultimate body I’d love to coach you.  Please check the life changing stories of women just like you who’ve turned their lives around on my Get Lean Program.


90 Day Get Lean Body Transformation Program <<<<







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{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }

Belinda February 10, 2016 at 12:03 pm

I was diagnosed with multiple slipped discs a few years ago. Had expensive therapy and recovered, but not 100%. I’m afraid to overdo certain exercises as I don’t know what is my limit because a flare up will only happen 2 days after I performed the exercise. So I don’t push myself, and progress (if any) is super slow :(


Belinda February 15, 2016 at 5:06 pm

Hi Belinda, I understand. Could you please message me via my Help Desk and I will see how I can help :)

Hug, Bel XO


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